DON’T READ: How one email wins office Pride celebration

My hands were trembling while typing my Appeal for my boss requesting her to honor the contribution of members of the LGBT community especially in attaining our organizational mission and vision. At first, I was cautious because I knew that my message might insult the conservatives in the office. However, one’s religion should not be an issue when one’s worth, dignity, and existence are in the chopping board. I crafted the most passionate email I could ever imagine. Using all the skills I learned from Law School and from the psychology books I read, I laid down a message that they could not possibly disregard. I knew that I was about to test deep-rooted values, solid dogmas, multifarious of biases.

I started the email saying:

The discrimination against members of the LGBT community in the country is not a secret, corollary to this, are their significant sacrifices and selfless contributions in support to our mission and vision as an organization.

That time, tears started to form in my eyes but my vision was not clouded, I was resolute to get the message across.

This dynamic can be seen in our country’s experience with gay and lesbian rights. Since 316 BC, gays were prosecuted, placed inside lion dens, crucified, skinned while alive. Today, these most brutal machinations have evolved into policies, guidelines, and pronouncements that brand LGBTs as immoral, second class citizens, and even considered homosexuality as an illness, until this year, it was overturned by the World Health Organization. However, this stigma concerning members of the LGBT community are enabled by mere silence and insidious and blinded acceptance of the society.

There I immediately built the background. I specifically used 316 BC to emphasize that these cruelty and discrimination are happening since the beginning of time and 21^st century science had already overturned some of their painful generalizations of homosexuals for example. It was necessary also to point out that these barbaric maneuverings in the past have evolved into policies, guidelines, etc that preserve the evils of the past. My third paragraph reads:

I am writing shine a new light to the eclipsed contribution of the LGBT community in nation-building. I am not writing to demand people to accept homosexuals as saints, what I plead, is that, now, we acknowledge that homosexuals etc are like us, they breathe like us, they work like us, they are with us from the beginning.

I was ready that time to hand over my resignation letter. I knew that challenging the system again might result to my demise. But the principle that I am fighting for is more important than any position or any security of tenure. I could not stay silent when I could actually speak respectfully on the possible merits of my advocacy.

Since I started this job, I’m thankful because here, we value inclusion. But how about our LGBT professors and consultants who helped us build our projects? How about the youth LGBT organization in Cebu? how about our gay suppliers, drivers. Are their contributions less compared to straight men and women?

Tears fell and these tears smooched my keyboards. But instead of pressing the backspace to delete my draft, I chose to press the (coma) and continue writing.

Our Facebook page celebrates Fathers day, Mothers Day, International Women’s Day, all of these are celebrations based on sex and marginalization. Sadly, we forget to celebrate our brothers and sisters in the community.

We have (2) days left before the Pride month celebration, the community since 2012 are watching us. I pray that we take the positive stance against discrimination and violence toward LGBT people to promote, increase their visibility as a social group, build community, and celebrate their contribution in building our vision, this Nation, no more no less. They too deserve it.

Then I press send.

Stillness then filled the entire office. My workmates were mute the whole day. No one raised a question or any response to the email I sent. Then, I understood maybe, I hit a string, or maybe my message was not good enough worthy of their attention.

After 24 hours, I received an email from my boss, she said.

Mikee, I acknowledge that their [LGBT’s] contribution and struggle are real. I also understand your empathy and concern for our partners who may not have the same experience of inclusion as we enjoy.

Let’s celebrate PRIDE MONTH later.

The response of my boss made me to love her more. Her words were full of empathy and by mere acknowledging that our contribution and struggle are real, elevated her to be one of the best leaders in the workplace here in the country. Now, I even realized that yes, we may have differences, but mere differences do not divide us, what divides us is our inability to celebrate and acknowledge these differences.

The struggles of the LGBT community are real, yes. And like any other political movements, we should start the movement in the ground. Our strategy should come in a place closest to our hearts. Our legacy should start in one small step at a time, one door at a time, one person, one friend at a time.

All men and women are created equal in dignity and in rights. And my boss upheld this belief and opened her heart for me.

There is hope.

 

 

 

Mutya asks President to help PH nurses

Just in case the news skipped your notice Mr. President, thousands of our skilled Filipino nurses are now leaving the country not because they want to touch the snow in London, not because they want to visit Santorini in Greece, not because they want to date a handsome and hunky Caucasian or a rich Arab woman, but because our system forced them to do so.

Our callous disregard to their rights made them to believe that they are second-class healthcare workers. Verily, our nurses suffer the lowest possible indecency a country can inflict to its professional workers.

And they have valid license from the Professional Regulation Commission. They are required to have an accumulated CPD units, but when our nurses require the same good treatment from this government, what do they get? — Nothing!

Again, I’m sorry to speak about this, but I can’t sleep seeing my fellow nurses suffer. I am not working in a hospital now but my heart is still beating for my profession. My heart is still beating for the Nightingale in white, in blue and in scrubs. Allow me to speak for them.

I don’t blame you Mr. President that you are currently focusing on “War on Drugs”, but as a form of request, can we give equal attention to those who fight alongside with you inside the hospitals, the fences of communities, penal institutions and healthcare centers?

How can we possibly heal the country if our healers are wounded themselves?

How can we miraculously rehabilitate this archipelago if our nurses are now starting to fly abroad?

Currently, I’m envious about the attention you give to ‘Transporation Modernization’. In my mind, “lucky are the jeepneys, for they will be modernized soon”, but pain are for our poor nurses who will still be living and working in areas where modernization is not part of the plan.

Make no mistake Mr. President, our nurses are still living under inhumane conditions that pose risk to their own personal health. These are competent and intelligent Filipinos who passed the board exams. In fact, we cannot even provide them with adequate soap and alcohol for their hand sanitation, N92 masks for airborne protection, and heavens sake, we don’t pay them with dignity.

Before it’s too late Mr. President, I would like to invite your attention to this maladies enveloping our Filipino nurses. They deserve to experience the “change” that you promised during the election season. Thank you!

#Mutya

The type of ‘gwapo’ the Philippines needs today

His heart made him more handsome than his face ever could.

Redefining the meaning of gwapo, Rainier is successful in doing so. I first met him two years ago during their live screening for Ideas Positive Run 8. He was shy back then, unable to speak without a pause, but at first blush, I knew he was a vessel of something more than his face value.

Looking at my score sheets,  I realized the team would not make the cut. The project was promising but lacked the required oomph. The judges were sure to let go of the team. Exchanges of heated arguments started to fill the room, endless negotiations and hostile presentation of what ifs,and what nots. I was sure that time, that while their idea was not ripe, Rainier’s heart was. When I saw him, I was so sure, he was the one, the Philippines is longing for.

I introduced a new precedent, a new interpretation of the text, advancing a theory that we should take full consideration of not only the quality of the idea, but the holder of these ideas. I was gaining attention that time, I finished the blow by saying “There is no alternative in this case, to rule against the team, is to choose a blind eye and disregard the humanity which is central to this competition.”

I was anxious that time. Did I push too hard on the basis of gut feeling? I prepared my resignation letter in case the project will fail. With God’s grace, they succeeded.

Rainier or Dochi at 23, redefines the concept ‘genuinely handsome’. His appearance if taken as a whole does not only commands attention, but more so, it inspires action.

His persona if you only take it as whole, opens not only the mind, but captures the heart.

Take Dochi as a whole, and your life will change. This is his power. Rainier is more than the sum total of his parts, he is a miracle waiting to be beatified.

And this is what I will do today. With the power vested in me by the Division Superintendent, (NO!) by the Mutya of all ages, the unlimited, the breaker of chains, the all beauty, I declare Dochi as the living symbol of beauty and purpose in one body, more than the physical aspect, his inner beauty shines to uplift the lives of others. This makes him special.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
#Mutya

Liberate yourselves from pain, use dreams.

My lola is still very clever. At 92, she is the master of symbolism. She gave me a book for my birthday. The title is ‘The Dream’ by Harry Bernstein. This is about a young boy named Harry’s incredible pursuit of his dream that one day they might escape the grinding poverty for the paradise of America.

My lola’s prodigy is my mother. When I was young she told me that pain is necessary for me to grow. For the past 26 years, I have carried this theory that every time I experience tremendous amount of pain, my tendency is to rationalize.

My ruling is to always uphold what my mother had implanted in my mind; that pain is the twin brother of mine. That according to her, life is unfair and people will always inflict pain, and I cannot prevent this from happening. In my mind, where did she get this hasty conclusion? Is this a form of wisdom or did she read the book on Human Nature? Or is it really the reality that the world is inherently cruel?

Living inside the house with an atrocious father for me is the very definition of pain. Not until, that same house of cards over a decade ago, while I was competing for our school quiz bee, where I won the 1st place, fell to the ground– shattered to pieces.  It was an emotional roller coaster of sorts, seeing your family broke apart. For me it was the endgame, when Thanos snapped his fingers where all the values and the aspirations evaporated.

Not until my lola used the power of dreams. According to her dreams are important part of our lives. She painted a picture of me in black robes, like a judge. Now, I understand that she invented this vision for me to make up for all the things I lacked and to give me some hope for a better future. Perhaps, also to envelope me against grief and misery.

Since today is the Philippine Independence Day, I will not delve on how the Philippines acquired independence, but more so, I will try to present how we can liberate ourselves from pain by pointing out three truths. While I do not have the monopoly to experience pain, I think, I have a unique experience worthy of at least, my own simple documentation.

Most of the time we asked ourselves if pain is necessary. Why can’t men live with pure joy and contentment. Our theological beginnings tell us that the world and its accompanying obstacles are tests before we reach the paradise– a place free from pain and suffering. Whether or not we take this as a sugar-coated belief, there are certain universal truths that we humans should consider.

The first step to independence is knowing that we are alive. We experience pain because we need a reminder that we are alive, and in return we learn the value of joy and the beauty of this world. This is always what my best friend Alfred tells me every time I feel depressed. He is not a good counselor but an excellent positivist in his own sphere.

Second, I have realized that silence exacerbates pain. Pain needs to be verbalized, it needs to be expressed. We need to be courageous enough to confront pain head on. Having an understanding circle of friends would help in addressing this. Sometimes, their active listening and their warm presence save the day. In short, liberation needs expression. 

Lastly, dreams are powerful than pain. Whenever pain creeps into the picture, one must immediately go back to his dreams, imagine that this is real, hold it in his hands and like a handful of colorful dust, sprinkle it on the dark canvass of life. While people can hurt us every day, in whatever unimaginable or imaginable ways, we have to acknowledge that pain is inevitable in our daily lives and we have a more powerful tool to combat this.

Some of us will fall, some will rise and defeat this foe, but at the end of the day, pain is always essential and we need to do our best to shape it to support our existence and in furtherance of our individual purpose in life, for liberation.

#Mutya