The roses aren’t as pretty
The sun isn’t quite as high
The birds don’t sing as sweet of a lullaby
The stars are a little bit faded
The clouds are just a little more gray
And it feels like things won’t ever be the same

-Heaven Got Another Angel (Gordon Garner)

Exactly one year ago, I rushed to the airport to catch the earliest flight for Iloilo. I was hoping that God will grant me the power of teleportation. I know it was very near, it will come very soon. Drafting a special poem while I was waiting in the pre-departure area, I received a text message which weakens my knees. Tears begun to fall, I couldn’t see the letters on my keyboard. My beloved dad passed away because of lung cancer.  He was waiting for me. He was waiting for me. I was late for the first time.

Exactly two years ago, in our round table. He served the most delicious seafood cuisine. It was shrimp and green shells. While eating, he gave me his “YES”, because I asked permission from him if I could practice nursing in Manila. I know, he was sad because he wanted to spend more time with me. He felt that he had less time. But I was too ambitious.

Exactly three years ago, at the seaside, together with my mom, my father said that sooner or later, human life like the sea will reach its low tide, but high tide will soon to follow. I did not took it seriously because I was busy thinking for the results of my board examination. He promised that when I pass the boards, he will launch a large festivity in our barangay. And he made it happen. He always does.

The wound is still there—-painful and still bleeding. It never stops.

I miss his hugs and his praises.

I miss his genuine smile.

I miss his advice.

Serve your country”, he said.

Dad, if you are listening and reading this blog, I am proud to say to you that I am serving my country and please help me all the way.

I love you forever.

Your Mutya.


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